Cereal Profiles, Entry 2 : Lucky Charms

Lucky Charms:

For some, the be all and end all for sugar cereals. For me, Lucky Charms was the first focused obsession in the realm of sugar cereals.

There was so much to think about. At first, the “marshmallows” were sensation overload. Luckily they mixed in the oat bits. Then they started to frost the oat bits. More sugar. Thank god. Then, the more I ate Lucky Charms, the more I realized there were too many oat bits.

Eating Lucky Charms then became a game, or perhaps a strategy. I had to eat all of the oat bits first so that I had pure spoonfuls of marshmallow bits at the end. Of course there were times when The Snackmaster bought a brand new box and poured out the entire contents and sorted my business out.

That’s all the wonderfulness of Lucky Charms, without even speaking about the magic that surrounds it. To put it bluntly, it epitomizes the children’s sugar cereal genre. We all know “Lucky the Leprechaun”. Lord knows we all loved watching the commercials of him fighting with the kids to get his magic pot of Lucky Charms. You can’t tell me you weren’t captivated by the arrival of a new shape. As many as 10 different shapes. Only Lucky Charms brought you that much diversity.

There is nothing wholesome about Lucky Charms. You know you’re not getting a balanced breakfast. You know you’re eating it cause you want to jump right into snacking in the morning. The milk doesn’t count. You know the milk doesn’t substantiate enough nutrition in the morning. Lucky Charms had the more interesting back of boxes to read too. You know you never had to look at a montage of photos of wheat or baskets of grains while reading flowery language about how the manufacturers made their cereal from the healthiest ingredients. You read the back of Lucky Charms’ boxes to play some kiddy puzzle or maze, or read an entertaining comic about the trouble Lucky has been getting in lately.

You have a box of Lucky Charms in your hand, you have the total package.